Lollipup,  Rescued From A Puppy Mill.  She’s been adopted!

Rescued from the life as a breeding dog at a puppy mill, three year old Lollipup arrived at NCCR on January 29, 2022. Time, patience and a lot of TLC is needed to help her adjust to a new way of living. After a short stay at the Rescue, she was taken to her foster home. Follow her progress with updates from her wonderful foster mom.

Day 1: Decompression stage. I let her stay in the crate in our living room to watch & listen to our lives. TV/music on, sweeping (vacuum wouldn’t have been cool) cooking, laundry.I offered food/water to no avail. I only moved her to take her outside where she tried to make herself small & hidden.Later when I found she had soiled herself where she laid in her crate, the decision to give her a bath was made, though I don’t recommend so soon. I held her in the tub, she took this pretty well, and laid next to the oven in the kitchen. She has yet to eat anything from my hand, and I offered some good stuff. The only water she has drank is off my hand. She more than likely had no bowls in her previous state. This morning upon seeing my figure she ran to the corner shook and soiled herself. Once she realized it was me her head perked up and her eyes followed me. Very encouraging!! Now she is on my lap, my beautiful Maggie doing her job next to us.

Day 2: Lollipup had a good day! Slow to start and I had to dig her out of another self proclaimed “safe spot” that I felt wasn’t acceptable. As I got busy with my pack and chores she spent her time between the refrigerator and wall head down and very tightly packed in. I literally had to drag/carry her shaking stiff body out. All four legs are spread eagle during this. Once outside with a loose hanging slip lead on her she walked closely to me between my legs and touching them with her nose. She was starting to see me as security!!! She did however watch my pack with interest. Once inside and settled we cuddled on the loveseat again and we all snoozed. With a puppy pad on my lap. Lollipup has submissive/fearful peeing. Meaning if you touch her, talk to her, move her, she pees😳. Lollipup has not eaten or drank anything since she came except some water off my fingers. Last night I had chicken broth offered it to her using the finger method and it worked. I also offered her food with chicken, that worked from my hands also, then finally she ate and from the bowl!! I let her find her own place in the living room for our evening, she went right to in front of the love seat we have been cuddling in. She stayed there watching the pack & enjoyed her visit with family; very receptive to their words and loving pets. ❤️

Day 3: Lollipup slept all night in her new “safe”spot, only lifting her head to check me out. We exchanged pleasantries then I lifted her (pee pad wrapped around her butt) and took her outside with the pack. Once we were there I set her down and she took her position between my legs, walking is fun this way😳. I can see she was interested in the pack, but didn’t stray far, resuming her position. Of course no potty outside even though I walked her up to some “land mines”. Then we were off to the veterinary services for her spay appointment. Potty pad & blanket readied car which she soiled, and of course tried to find a safe spot to squeeze herself in. She was her stiff, shaking self as we entered the veterinary clinic. I carried her in with vet techs opening & closing doors. Puppy Mill dogs are EXTREME flight risks, always looking for a way out, not caring where they go.Instead of leaving her at the vets overnight, I brought her home when she was somewhat coherent. Of course I had to dig her out as half of her was stuffed under the car seat upon arrival home. Lollipup’s safe spot was set up with a cozy bed, pee pad and blanket. She slept & slept, only woke occasionally to search for me or the pack. I did offer her water and she drank quite a bit from the bowl! Poor honey has yet to have a bowel movement, so a pain pill this morning (one for me too🤣) and a nice long trot outside should work. Thank goodness I’m learning to walk with her between my legs!I guess the most important take on yesterday would be, this beautiful mama will not have to endure being impregnated by forced means, give birth in a cold, dirty, unhealthy, lonely cage, and have her babies taken away much to early. She will no longer be used at a profit making vessel with no real worth. Those days are over my baby girl and we will love & protect you until your ready to move on❤️

Day 4: Well not much movement in the bowel movement area or off her safe spot. She is more aware and follows my movements. Lollipup was rather knocked out yesterday because of her spay surgery and the drugs were good.We did however get outside many times walking laps to entice any kind of intestinal activity to no avail. So the big question is do I kick start her bowels with some pumpkin and take the hit readied with paper towels, mop & bucket? Takin’ one for the team.😳 She has to be a tad uncomfortable. Lollipup ate twice yesterday & drank many times, but my hand needs to be in the bowl either offering substance or just there for moral support. I see strides in her comfort with me, if I put the slip lead on her and gently tug she will get up and follow me outside. She promptly takes her place between my legs. Walking laps in this fashion takes mad skills. She does have a natural “heal” sitting every time I stop. Upon returning indoors I let her off the lead, and with low stance she explores a bit then returns to her safe place.Baby steps.❤️

Day 5: Woke up before dawn to let my girls out and stepped in a small pond, our girl peed and not where she laid! No 💩 but the day is young, I’m not! Rewind to yesterday, Lollipup is more eager to go outside with the pack, yet still is between my legs. I did acquire a new skill though, shoveling out the “track” with her there, minimal injuries. Now if I can only get her to make that “pond” outside. She readily enters our home, and is exploring more, still low to the ground but confidence growing.Lollipup has had issues with the food I have been offering, mixture of dry, canned & chicken. It seemed she didn’t know how to handle dry food.As I offered her pumpkin, she lapped it up from my hand in no time. Which got me to thinking maybe she was accustomed to a gruel type of food?So canned mixed with water was offered and she ate excellently!So today my blender will be used for more than smoothies. As we were all having a quite moment I heard “thump, thump, thump” I look down and Lollipup’s tail was wagging! What a beautiful sight! She was obviously having a dream❤️Looking forward to the day she wags while awake.😉

Day 6: We started our day at 6AM trucking around the track with my girl pasted to my legs. I did drop the lead hoping she’d take a potty detour, so waiting to throw down with a potty party! But that has yet to happen😳 Where is she storing this stuff?! Since Lollipup won’t consider getting up to find food or water, I’m the caterer, scooping water & gruel from the bowls so she can lick off my fingers & just sometimes taking a lick out of said bowl. This is a totally messy situation as she laps food and gruel all over herself, nearby furniture & her bed.
She is more in tune with our movements and responds to her slipleash when in her view. Actually got a coat on her with just a tad of wrestling.
I held her a few times and she has finally looked in my eyes for longer than an uncomfortable moment. She seems happier, that is until I ran the vacuum 😳 She has turned into quite the music fan, Bowie being her fav for now. Soothing the savage beast🤣

Day 7: This pic explains another truth in Puppy Mills. What was thought to be a skin condition upon quick glance turns out to be a shaved area. This happens upon receiving PM dogs who are either so very matted that they are shaved down completely (this type of matting is very painful) or the fact that they are covered in excrement. This happens if cages are stacked on top or one another. The poor dog on the bottom layer really gets the worst of it. Or in the case of a cage holding numerous dogs they end up laying in their own or others excrement. So my theory is she was shaved being matted with 💩.

Day 8: Well our girl must feel better, I know we all do! This intestinal disturbance happens all to often for not just Puppy Mill dogs.The stress and changes around them, situational, food, people etc. Some become strays, lose their owner, are born to become yet another money making puppy machine. Which ever the situation their journey is tough. They find them self in a strange noisy chaotic place, they smell the stress in the air. Then possibly a transport to another shelter, this can be 7 states away or a nearby city. Transports are conducted by several drivers taking approx 90minute “legs” these babies are switched from one car to the next, a sort of relay.Then again another noisy chaotic place waiting for their forever home. We see dogs like this everyday. They shut down, pancake to the ground or walk low with tail between legs, head down but eyes peeking at their new situation.Finding the nearest corner in their kennel to “hide” to decompress. They rarely eat or drink for a few days. Once their system starts to repair itself, the runny explosive diarrhea begins. Stress, food changes, parasites, illness the causes. Medication given and hope for the best.My point, Lollipup was not out of the norm with her intestinal issues, yet concerning.Yesterday was a rejoiceful day as our girl finally voided. We were all rooting for her! This beautiful happening was preceded by Lollipup greeting me by the door with the rest of the pack upon my arrival home (a beautiful sight) She followed the pack outside and successfully did the deed!!!She is also readily drinking from her water bowl placed next to her safe spot🙌 Baby steps😘

Day 9: Lollipup is continuing to make small strides. As you can see by the pic she jumped up on the love seat herself. She is rather comfortable with me now and loves her face kissed & nuzzling. She will still cower when I walk up to her, I guess that would be a looming figure that still makes her uneasy. At puppy mills these babies are treated as livestock, just grabbed, pushed, pulled & manipulated to the needs of their handler. This is usually a bearded man with a hat. This is why most of these dogs are afraid of males. Upon meet & greets with perspective adopters we ask the man to remove his hat if we see alarm in the dog.This is why they cower, hide their faces, try to make themselves small, tremble and are always trying to find an escape. This is why they are an extreme flight risk. Their treatment is less than humane in every aspect. They need time and patience to realize they are truly safe, once that occurs they will build trust. Some of these babies recover to a somewhat normal dog, other live with these emotional scars for life. My Maggie is a former puppy mill mama, she is still afraid of humans after 2+ years of joining our family. Has yet to play with a toy, and her feelings are hurt very easily. Her nickname is “Broken Puppy” and I am her “job!” Maggie is an integral part of our pack in so many ways.Lollipup has been following the pack greeting me at the door upon arrival. Today she “sprinted” back to her safe spot (this is fun to watch because she can’t get traction, poor honey) but as I sat down on the floor to greet my fur family she came to me for her lovins. Oh my heart!!She seems housebroken (I may regret saying this😳) as we only had one accident, the “pond incident” and that was within the first couple days and is to be expected with any new dog.So after I install my plastic mattress pad, we will bring her to bed with us tonight. She has been very interested in our bedtime routine. I’m hoping this will provide more security for her. Thanks for following along😘

Day 10: With the recent news story of 30 Goldendoodles being rescued from the Village of East Aurora, the question in my mind is how did this happen in plain sight?!? Which brought me back to a very special foster whom I named “Squeaks.”Squeaks came to me a mess, matted, scared, skin & bones, but a lil fire in his eyes. After he became comfortable he “barked” or what seemed to pretend to be one, but it came out as a squeak.I was perplexed for a bit but the the horrible realization hit me, his vocal cords had been cut. Since Puppy Mill dogs don’t visit veterinarian offices, I could only imagine the stomach sickening way this is crudely done. This disgusting practice is done in many puppy mills to “quiet” the residents thus being more incognito.Savagery at best. Our Squeaks is happily living in Canada with his “sister” & wonderful parents. The beauty here is we became friends and I receive regular updates & pictures. On to our Lollipup, as you can see she adopted a toy. Since it crackles I hear her “play” with it occasionally. She has taken up residence on the love seat watching us all from her perch with interest. Her expression just looks better these last couple of days. She is scampering to go outside with the pack and waits with them to come back in resuming her spot. Lollipup is eating very well out of her bowl. We did bring her into the bedroom last night, but she was very nervous with the new surroundings that I brought her back to her safe spot. We well get there!

Day 11: Lollipup is moving along nicely❤️ Yesterday we had 2 sets of visitors, at first she was a tad scared (you could see it in her eyes) then settled in and observed from her spot. She welcomed soft conversation & pets from my Caitlin & Maddie. She is walking away from the door and doing her own laps when I don’t accompany the pack outside. I have to prop open my storm door for the mad dash out, because if it’s closed she will dash with much calamity back to her spot. We have had no accidents potty wise, but damn her farts are almost equal to our beloved Rottie “Zeus” and if you were familiar with his eye watering stench you can gauge your own opinion. We didn’t try the bedroom last night, but she watches our bedtime routine and the morning wrestling match. In breakthroughs, I got 3 random kisses on my hand last night & she approached and laid her head on my leg. Oh my heart. I am working on her to go into the kitchen for food and water. My kitchen is within eyesight of her spot. So we are placing her and her dish on the floor and will over time move it closer to the kitchen. Thank you to all that observed that she just looks better, sometimes we ourselves don’t see the obvious.

Day 12: This baby girl❤️ I can tell she is very smart and definitely taking everything in. When I get up in the middle of the night that beautiful lil head pops up to watch me. A few pets and soothing words we go back to sleep. Lollipup loves her new safe spot as from her vantage point she has full view of our home. I had to leave for some errands and when I grabbed my jacket, Lollipup made her scramble to the door. Poor girl needs something for traction🤣 I was gone most of the day and returned to her by the door with the pack wagging her tail, low wag, but wag nevertheless❤️ She went outside with her buds and promptly did her thing💩. When I finally sat down she snuggled next to me and put her head on my leg. I was honored.The food bowl on the floor is a struggle as she keeps wanting to get back to her spot. So I tried sitting with her between my legs to feed her to no avail. This may take a bit. But I’m sure her new family will not want to feed her on their furniture. 🤣 Baby steps.She still is afraid when she is approached by a standing figure, me included, but her eyes soften when I’m down at her level. Lollipup is more relaxed for our full on body snuggles, thinking she may look forward to them. ❤️ Thanks for following along!

Day 13: As you can see Lollipup is relaxed in my arms, I am totally flattered! She still won’t leave her safe spot except for the mad dash to go outside with the pack. I am now putting a long yoga mat down for her runway. It may give her more confidence to roam without skidding all over.We took her into the bedroom for the morning wrestling match on the bed. Though scared she did lighten up with all of us around her, and watched with curiosity. We will continue this exercise until she is comfortable enough to spend the night on the bed. I swear she stays awake at night because every time I get up she’s staring at me. Puppy Mill dogs are super vigilant and react to the smallest sound, movement, smell etc. Our home is not the quietest at certain times, which is good as Lollipup will learn to live in the real world. The more they are exposed to the better they will adapt. It’s kind of a sink or swim attitude around here and it has worked. So, I have found each time I put on any jacket Lollipup makes the chaotic journey to the door. I’m finding before I do don a jacket I must prepare making a clear runway.I do not go out with her every time and let my pack earn their keep by aiding her. Yet, where ever I am anywhere near the door she takes up her spot between my legs, lucky I haven’t hit the deck with these icy conditions!Hey better than mud!Waiting for the moment when she will feel confident enough to explore our home, not just from her vantage point.😉

Day 14: So as the pack woke this morning and the mad dash to the door was made and our girl joined them! No prompting, guess she had to go! 😳 If they could only share with us, wouldn’t that open a whole new world. We are still working on soothing the aches & trauma from her horrible ordeal. Time, love and patience being the keys.

Day 15: Lollipup napped with us on the bed! She settled right in next to me watching her fur sisters doze off. We even had a small snore from her. This was after a good playtime in the sunshine, which she did a couple of laps by herself. In the morning she ran to the door to go outside once again and repeated this behavior during the day. No jacket required. 😉 Lollipup wants to keep herself clean, after eating or drinking she cleans off her legs and paws, remember she’s a messy diner. She has no desire to clean her hairy poopy butt, so we have a more intimate relationship now, the looks she gives me during this routine are interesting. Hey, at least she’s pooping! Very slow on the eating anywhere near the kitchen, this is going to take some time. Our neighbor came over to visit with Lollipup today and she was pretty receptive to her. She does have the touch, and plenty of experience as she is part of my dog journey and loves it.Also, our puppy neighbor came over for a play date, being a young stud he found Lollipup somewhat desirable, she was not amused and rebuffed his advances. Can’t say I don’t blame her, she is retired🤣

Day 16: Lollipup slept with us last night! She was pretty unsure but decided to curl up/lay on Tessa and rest her eyes. Pads under her stinky butt🤪 Time for dog grooming and trim that thing! In other non 💩 news, our girl didn’t run straight back to her spot upon coming in from a potty break, and instead stayed in the kitchen with me finding her place between my legs. We hung for a bit and had a conversation explaining this is the watering hole. I have to offer Lollipup water many times a day as she won’t actively seek it, a work in progress. Also, in the area of substance she is now eating kibble mixed in with her gruel! Yay!! I’m not quite sure if I welcome her walking through our home between my legs, but again I’ll take one for the team. Hell, if I can walk on ice with her there😉 She is still very weary of me standing over her, this may be one thing that stays with her for a long while. I can’t help but see the trauma in her soulful eyes. This tears at me, I just want to love her enough to make it go away. Due time….

Day 17 & 18: Lollipup is getting into the groove of things around here. Going in and out like a champ with a little less calamity.She actually came in and sat between my legs instead of the mad dash to her spot. So we hung out in there for awhile, letting her get comfortable. She now has to touch me and turns around so it’s her head instead of her butt that gets the attention. Lollipup has been having restful nights on the bed and looks for a pat and kind word when I get up and return to bed, she then puts her head back down to sleep.She is sitting up more in her spot of security and observing, I almost thought I saw a smile.I still need to offer her water many times a day, my hand in the bowl for her to drink. Eating, all I need to do is hand her a bit and she eats on her own licking to bowl clean. Yesterday I took her to the vet to check for a chip. Lollipup is housebroken, and as you can see by her behavior in the video a “heal” this is not standard fare for a PM dog.She was found to have a micro chip and I was excited to find a possible former owner. The chip has a very obscure number and through my search and the help of my shelter director we were unable to locate any information.I was informed that some mill dogs are micro chipped, for what reason I do not know. Wether she was in fact chipped at a mill or a private owner we won’t know, because the chip was never registered in the universal database. It was a nice thought for a bit to think there might have been a beautiful homecoming, but she is now registered with NCCR. This sweetest baby has taken up residence in our hearts we are her somebodies ❤️

Day 19 & 20: Well, we have reach a lull in our forward progress. Not disheartening, pretty much expected at some point. So time to push our efforts before Lollipup gets to comfy😉To make things exciting Lollipup in her haste jumped off the bed during the night (something spooked her) she scrambled underneath our bed without much of an exit plan. Well, when we woke she wanted to join the gang outside. It was almost laughable listening to the struggle.Remember our girl has fear/shy urination, well… I have a mess to clean up and on the way out from under she left a 💩 Thank God for candles. At least I didn’t have to disassemble our bed! Just a normal day in paradise 😳As you can see by the picture she is all cuddled in, no more tensing upon touch and 50% of her “lawn ornament” posture is gone upon lifting her.Man is she a heavy girl!! Pure solid pack! Carrying her takes mad skill as she hunkers down as a learned behavior to try to protect herself. Most Puppy Mill dogs are skin & bones, not this mama! I am considering a couple of applications on our girl. We have been inundated with them.Lollipup will need someone patient enough to continue to work with her. Someone who is home and into projects. At least another dog or so to help her continue to learn how to be one. The expectations of having a normal dog must be open to what she is capable of. I do know the love you will receive from your efforts will out weigh the challenge❤️. She won’t be ready until I can convince her to seek water & food. This would work much better once she is comfortable enough to leave her safe spot to explore the world she sees from her view point.Thanks for reading & all your loving support, as always keeps me moving😘

Day 22 & 23: Well look at this girl!! She is now sitting up and observing! Hopefully this will get her to explore more of her space. Maybe even find the water dishes. Lollipup will readily go outside with the pack, no more prodding. Upon entering she is hanging in the kitchen more often, so we visit for a while hoping she becomes more comfortable. Baby steps!! The best step of all in her growth was last night as we cuddled she fell asleep and was actually snoring❤️ This means she was totally at rest, can’t imagine how long it’s been since she was able to be.My heart…

Day 24 & 25: Lollipup is so interested in our activity (except the vacuum) a very welcome sight. She has been sitting up more to watch our crazy days. Our home goes from peacefully quiet to holy💩and music as a soundtrack for it.So, I keep it real so she can adjust to the real world easier. Of course if those things are extremely disturbing, then small dose’s.Now I get her head next to my leg rather than her butt, which was much warmer. Again I’ll take one for the team😉 As you remember I took the crate away the 2nd day.With crates and a PM dog it can go either way, it’s either further security or dreadful for them. I will leave them in the crate for a day or two, except for breaks outside, which takes on its own challenges. More about that later.I do this because they are going to scramble to the furthest spot from you & bury themselves so tightly in where ever they can fit. Poor honey’s.So it is for their safety & that of our home. For a couple of my babies they found comfort in the crate. I leave the door open & our Tessa usually joins them❤️ Crate placed where the action is. Speaking of action, Lollipup is a willing volunteer to go out with the pack. This morning our gal jumped off her spot and came to the bedroom 3 times as I was getting up! I almost saw a tail wag! Her tail is always low and tight to her body, a sign of stress.Still not much in the seeking substance department, yet willingly drinking more. I feel she’s finally getting enough water.Yet each day I see a little something🐾🙌🐾❤️

Day 26, 27 & 28: Well our gal Lollipup has just kind of been hanging taking in all around her.She has yet to explore, but certainly follows me around when I announce “who wants to go out?” or put on a jacket. She has been greeting me at the door when I arrive back from short or long absence. I don’t see a tail wag yet, but she wants me to acknowledge her and give her a pet.She’s torn on whether to stay with me in the unfamiliar to her kitchen or return to her safe spot. I have been showing her the water dishes while she is visiting the kitchen, to no success of using them. Yet if I call her she turns around for more pets.Same for the bedroom, when I first wake she runs in to greet me and the girls. Back & forth, wiggling. I put her on the bed with us at night but each morning she is on the loveseat.Lollipup has been wanting to cuddle with me more lately and doesn’t have much of stiffening of her body upon touch. She still is not comfortable with my standing in front or walking up to her, so I remain mindful of this and join her on the floor or her loveseat safe spot. I think she has hit her plateau for now, but with these babies you never know when they will surprise you❤️

Day 29 & 30: Lollipup developed a slight eye infection that we have been keeping clean, warm soaks and Itty & Tessa cleaning😉 Well yesterday we visited the vet for an antibiotic. Getting her to the car and in it WHEW!Since she is a hefty 40lbs carrying her for a short distance is not cool, especially wiggly and on ice/snow.So a clip leash and slip lead (this combo is used in transporting dogs as I sometimes do for my transport group) was placed on our girl.She was confused and tried to get between my legs on the unfamiliar trek to my car. When I opened the door she freaked! Tried biting off one of the leads. Lifting her into the car she immediately jumped out. Repeat maneuver, 2nd time a charm. I thethered her to the seat with a chain leash (try to chew that apart when I’m driving🤣) Yes, I do have crates but putting her in with her weight and all fours spread eagle by myself is not going to be pretty for either one of us. Well as you can see she rode very well watching me with a perplexed look. Upon arrival at the vets, a vet tech, Adam came out to carry her in to the office. Once in there I calmed her and Doc checked her eye out. She was excellent not really stiffening up or trying to escape. Sarah the vet tech came in to visit with Lollipup and remarked how well she seemed to be doing. Sarah recalled when she came into be spayed she was totally shut down with face crammed in corner of kennel and as she was touched she would wiggle further into that corner.Not yesterday Lollipup welcomed Sarah’s touch. She has an antibiotic eye drop😉Upon arriving home she made a beeline for our home & to her safe spot.

Day 31, 32, 33: Well, we are still in a bit of a holding pattern. Poor Lollipup is still so afraid of my standing figure😢 I always sweet talk her as I approach but she cowers and tries to make herself small. Even as I sit she is uncomfortable until after a few minutes and she relaxes. I have noticed if I use a different moisturizer she is leery. Last night I think I might have had a (2nd hand) smoke smell on me and the poor girl couldn’t get away from me fast enough. Gives me more insight to her “captors” She does loops now from her perch (loveseat) around the coffee table and back, stepping on Tessa in the process, guess she’s taking one for the team!I feel this may be a combo of fear & excitement, as she displays this when I return home after a few hours.She still greets me at the door with the pack & last night wanted so badly to get lovins she ran back & forth to her safe spot. I did get a few pats in.Then she proceeds to snuggle in with her head on my lap after some time.She still won’t seek substance because of her fears, an until she calms a bit I don’t see it happening anytime soon.Lollipup is very comfortable with my Maggie and they touch noses often.Poor Maggie is dismayed because Lollipup has stolen her spot next to mom. So another member taking one for the team🙌I’m feeling pretty helpless in trying to ease her fear, it hurts to see her in such a state.

Day 34, 35, 36: I do believe I see a smile on this chick! Lollipup experienced her first porch sit when we had that marvelous 70degree day. She sat calmly and just enjoyed. I put a harness, clip lead, and slip lead on her, (I don’t trust collars only for these particular babies) the minute I put the leads on she automatically went between my legs for her automatic heel. I still find this fascinating as it has been described to me as military training. It just is so embedded in her psyche. Another thing I have noticed in her frantic movements to get outside and back to her safe spot she always passes behind me not in front. Since it’s so muddy (help me) we wait in the mudroom for feet to be wiped & dry a bit. Lollipup comes to me sits and anticipates me lifting her paws. She has “mops” for paws😳 We get lovings and she snuggles in.She greets me at the door when I return from a outing with more enthusiasm and wanting to be fussed over. Her normal laps around the table ensue. She is still afraid of my standing figure. Since the beginning of this journey I have been giving her body massages as she allowed, well now her body is relaxed after a few minutes and she seeks these sessions. She is always touching me as we sit together. Still unwilling to seek substance which is quite problematic, but it is a total confidence thing, just will take time. What I have been doing as she greets me at the door, I sit on the floor in the kitchen next to the water bowls (yes, we have multiple) and try to introduce the concept plying her with pets. All in all I see her mood lifting a tad, I’ll certainly take that as a compliment ☺️ Lollipup is totally into Neil Young!

Day 37 & 38: Well our girl Lollipup’s plateau has ended! You may be aware that Itty has taken over Tessa’s ear & eye cleaning duties. She has been grooming Lollipup since she has allowed it. This is last nights action.Lollipup was smiling and lovin life. After her grooming session, she proceeded to lick my hand, her sign to me that pettings must not end. She has definitely become more animated & interested in our antics.We are all dealing with mud (help me) and you all have my deepest sympathies. To deal with multiple paws, always an odd number with our tripod Tessa, I have my mudroom floor covered with flannel sheets (they are more absorbent) and use a dunk bowl for paws. We dunk & wipe. Lollipup has this down lately and basically waits her turn with her face in mine. She used to try to bolt into the house if the door opened the slightest bit (I let the littles in first or they get trampled) now she has learned “stay” When I sit on our mudroom bench, Lollipup sits right in front of me, leaning, wanting her lovins and won’t move!! 🤣 Not that I mind this at all, bring it on my beautiful girl! Thanks for reading 🐾❤️

Day 39 & 40: Well this morning Lollipup met me in the middle of the living room to go out. She took her place between my legs and out we went. It’s amazing how she has opened up to the concept of seeking attention. Hand kisses, head bumps & soft nose jabs being her actions. Itty is her best bud lately and Lollipop has been seeking her affection as well.She even lifted her head to my “hey Lolli” I am honored ❤️ Her smile slays me!I have been considering applications on our girl, finding the right home to continue her journey has been frustrating to say the least.We have been inundated with so many applications that I have put the conditions of, being home most of the day, a confident resident dog, & a fenced yard. Being home: because she still won’t seek substance. Not for the lack of trying every trick in the book, just sheer fear of leaving her safe spot. Confident resident dog: to show her how to be a real dog. Fenced yard: obvious reasons. She will certainly regress upon reaching her new home and her escape mode will be engaged. As I speak with prospective people, I am blown away by their nonchalant attitudes, half listening to my explanations about her behavior. This IS NOT a sad dog, but a severely damaged one! As I have stated in the many’s years I have been fostering, the past 6 years with puppy mills dogs, Lollipop is the 2nd worst damaged.They see a beautiful baby and hear “blah blah blah” then complain that they can’t get the dog to comply to their needs. Lollipup is NOT the prize for the win! I will keep her here and continue to read HER needs, proudly watch her slow baby steps growth for as long as it takes to find the loving, patient home she needs.Yes, I’m frustrated, no excuses except being totally in love with this beautiful soul.❤️.

Day 43, 44 & 45: This morning’s cuddle… Lollipup snuggles in, loving her body massage. Over the past few she has been following me around our home, out to the porch & in the back yard. To my athletic abilities? Thank you for hanging with me cause this girl MUST be between my legs!! Walking is a trip, literally🤪She seems happiest on the porch, smiling away next to my chair.Yesterday things got hairy (like that’s not a thing round here already) Maggie & Itty tagged teamed going completely psycho over EVERTHING that moved or breathed while on our porch sit… I let them know this is certainly not going to cut it all spring/summer long. During this crazy time, there was an escape attempt, so in my haste I grabbed Lollipop rather startling her, so back and forth we went, round in circles, and no, not a new dance. She finally went in the house with her tails tucked sisters.But left a trail of pee. My neighbors find me very entertaining. I share most of my food with my pack, I do eat rather healthy, nothing processed, pretty clean. Lollipup has picked up on this and is a willing participant. Cheese omelet being her fav. She also watches Itty who loves to clean up Lolli’s scrapes, and has taken to eat her treat expediently.I used to buy “piggy poofs” ( dehydrated cow stomach) for years, my dogs knew them by name and would do ANYTHING for one! Well, they are now among the missing😢So, Now don’t judge, I found pork rinds that have the same effect for 99 cents a bag, piggy poofs were up to 15.00! Our Lolli loves them!! May be how we get more action out of her. Hell, food motivates me🤣All in all she is doing wonderfully.She had a meet & greet at my home yesterday & 2 today. She did pretty well but was scared, allowed touch without shaking. She retreated to both her safe spots, the loveseat and her original on her bed on the floor.I’m happy for these meet & greets as prospective adopters can really see Lollipup’s state & the fact she will probably never be a normal dog, so sad to say. It takes that honeymoon right out of the expectations. Like I mentioned before we are feeling the waters and am in no hurry to let her go. It will all happen beautifully when it’s right. ❤️\

Day 51 & 52: Warning: sensitive 💩 subject, not for the weak of stomach🤢 So, don’t recall if I mentioned this before but our gal Lollipup has a dirty butt most of the time. I’m sure the first thing you will think is groom her butt. Good in theory but follow along. Sadly, I have barehandedly pulled poop off her hair around the surrounding area of her anus. It’s in her tail, back of legs and backside. Some times I get away with wet/soapy paper towels (bounty brand being the winner) then there are the times a full on bath with shower head, drain strainer & shampoo, still pulling it off with fingers. This was the case a midnight last night, as I’m next to her and thought the fragrance was gas. Sent her outside and holy shit when she came in!! You see I have been observing her poop behavior, (thrilling I know) but (pun intended) because of Lolli’s automatic sit, tail tuck, fear this leads to all kinds of mess’s in the rear region. So in fact she is causing this issue to herself. So unless we shave legs, tail and her whole back end (picture lion looking result) she’s going to continue having this issue. Why doesn’t she clean herself? With as much that is there a solid NO So we bathe, which with “pancaking” herself to the bottom of the tub, what crappy water is rinsed just sits on her undercarriage, thus lifting her solid 35lbs and flipping her to rinse and wash this is totally not well received, then repeat having righted her pancaked body. So it results in a scared dog & a drenched, weary, slightly po’d mom. So we hug it out for both our sanities becoming more drenched. Then bleach the tub, nailbrush, drying soaked floor & laundry. While I race to beat her to the love seat with extra protection for her wet self. Then to the clean bath with my self cause…yeah🥴 So it’s not all unicorns & rainbows my friends! Good thing she is cute!! And as I write this, Lollipup is sleeping next to me with that familiar smell💩

Day 53-58 The BIGGEST News!!! Lollipup came to me upon arriving home with a wagging tail!! I cried… It may not seem much to the average dog owner, but for me it means she is starting to love again.That she feels our love. I couldn’t be happier for her!I find she lightens up when I turn on our daily music, could possibly be that she is a Foo’s fan😉 Lollipup has also been caught chewing (if you call whatever that activity is chewing) on a small green rubber bone. I have also recognized that she “bops” things with her nose that she claims are hers. Me included❤️How I discovered this was observing her behavior when she is given a treat. Itty is the clean up crew & this includes Lolli’s food dish & any treats she doesn’t eat at that moment. So lately Lolli is “bopping” her treats and Itty see’s this as “back off lil one”🤣Good for you my curl girl!!This goes for the green bone also.In other news, Lolli still won’t venture much out of her spot much. I try, but the stress is seen in her actions to scramble back as fast as she can, and I mean scramble with reckless abandon.Just sad, but we will continue to go with it. I can see the baby steps continuing at a slow pace. Take all the time you need my baby girl, we got this❤️ Thanks for following😘

Day 59-68: So our girl Lollipup is definitely more animated these days. Watching with interest inside & outside. You can almost see the will, but the fear holding her back from joining the pack in their antics. It was mentioned to me that Lolli may have a “release” word from her seemingly trained stance. So I have been researching this with proper pronunciation starting with German language, and not getting to far. She still makes her mad dash to & from her safe spot, so trying to get her to take substance from the kitchen is a challenge. So I ask myself, if I don’t feed or water her will she sooner or later go find substance? Not very helpful in building trust. I have set food on her path, but she doesn’t take note. If I lock her in the kitchen with food & water, she’s so stressed to get to her safe spot she won’t think of indulging in any way. So here we are… A great breakthrough was her actually rolling over on her back so I could rub her belly easier & more coverage. Dogs in her predicament don’t take this chance.

All in all I do see subtle positive changes, especially how she lightens up & actually smiles when outside with the pack. Sometimes when I walk back to the door she will break and linger outside. Still in her “flight” mode she runs in circles in confusion as if looking for her spot between my legs or a recognizable safe place. Poor honey, it has to be so confusing for that pretty curly head❤️

Day 69-83: Yes, she’s on the bed with us! As you may remember from earlier posts, Lollipup would scramble back to her safe spot if I placed her on the bed. Over the days she has become very observant and interested in our antics/activities. She would lift her head to watch me when I got up at night. You could almost see the want to join us. So a couple of days ago I carried her into the bedroom to join us for a nap, and she settled right in, same for the night! This followed by her just joining us upon us going to bed. Last night I just announced “let’s go nite nite” and she assumed her spot! Observant & smart girl. Upon arousing she takes her place between my legs and out we go, no prompt. Once outside she does her business and returns to my side for lovins. I’m practicing the hand signals from the video of the extraordinary military dog and their trainer, she seems to have some familiarity to it, maybe if I trim her eye hair she will recognize them better🤣
Lolli has been greeting me at the door upon arrival, but now hanging around for lovins…She still won’t seek substance, but I think I have more chance on getting her try as she lingers more in the kitchen. With 3 water bowls one has to be noticed.As of late, I get more kisses, nose butts & she needs to touch me all the time. I’ll take it!❤️

Foster homes for puppy mill dogs are always needed. Learn more about fostering here: if you feel that you have the patience and time to devote to special needs dog, fill out the foster home application at the link above.

Day 84-102: Well we have reached another plateau. Lollipup is just in her own groove of comfort. I’m almost ready to think this just might be her existence, but I do believe in the positive and continued growth. There have been a few back slides, all out of fear. Lolli being very observant notices even the slightest change in our home, her surroundings etc. Change in her opinion is not good. She fears it, scrams away from it and takes out whatever is in her way, leaving a trail of urine. Fun wow! My feet can attest to this…she left burnout marks on my foot just this AM running in from morning potty break. Our backyard is under construction at the moment and Lolli is fully aware of every change!! I have walked her around these changes on a lead to really no avail. I placed a fan in our living room and all hell broke out. No, you can’t not do you in your home, hopefully a desensitization will happen with Lolli in time. If not her world will even be tougher. So let’s look at some positives with our beautiful girl.She sleeps in the bed with us each night, touching me.Likes car rides, getting in the car is dicey. Takes food from my hand. Greets me at the door for lovins. Has to sit next to me, again touching. Bops me with her nose for attention. Loves her body messages and sweet talk.Then there’s that complete adorableness!! Ever striving❤️🐾

Day 103-124: Look at our pretty girl all groomed! She did rather well at the groomers. I can tell she feels much better. Since we spend a lot of our time outside,this is a welcome hair cut. You see Lollipup still runs circles around me trying to find her spot when in the backyard to the point of exhaustion. As she won’t seek water (we have a doggie pool filled with it) so I end up putting her in the house to cool down. The porch is a different scenario she will sit right next to my chair and pop her head up for lovins. Porch sits are her fav, the minute I signal by opening the door she’s in. Lollipup tries to eat my potted flowers though, conflicted on chastising her as she is seeking substance 🤣The mad chaos to get outside and return to her safe spot, the love seat hasn’t changed. I leave the screen door unlatched for her quick exit as she will circle around if she can’t find that opening. She has complete tunnel vision upon this feat, running over whomever is in her way. Lolli is very observant & intelligent taking it all in like a sponge. Yesterday, she soiled on the floor while I was gone. Well I stepped in it, and of course my happy to see ya pups did also! Well, short on patience after my long day I was rather loud in my dismay.Lolli took this to heart by the look on her furface and intently watched me cleaning up the small disaster.When I sat next to her she couldn’t get close enough, I’ll take that as an apology darlin. Over all she is doing very well. I don’t believe she will ever be the poster child for a normal dog but her love & cuteness makes up for it. I have decided to put her back up for adoption as I feel I’ve gone as far as I can go in her growth journey.Lolli would benefit from more of a one on one situation.As you all know I entertain many dogs in different capacities, though good for Lolli, my time is spread. This girl has touched me so and I love her without pity, and in this I’m willing to give her up.My sweetest girl who has to cuddle in next to me, bop my arm, give me little kisses & look at me lovingly will forever be in my soul. Applicants must have a fenced yard, a confident resident dog & be home most of the time. I will continue to offer support to her new family❤️Thank you for reading!

Day 124-153: Hey Lolli lovers! Our girl hit a definite plateau. When Tico came to be with us, she found a mate to cuddle with, I suppose she found kinship in their common fears. Yet, it posed a problem, as Tico seems not as damaged as our Lolli, I was concerned that he may not grow following her lead. The chaos that ensues upon going in and out of the house escalated two fold! Upending water dishes, rugs and leaving burnout marks on my poor feet. So, conferring with my Marcia (our retired director) over my concerns about Tico’s recovery, we decided to try an anti anxiety med on Lolli. I’m not a big proponent of pharmaceuticals, but when used correctly with moderation & watchfulness they can be extremely helpful. A trip to our shelter vet, exam and low dose amitriptyline I was hopeful in waiting the couple weeks it takes to see a difference if any.It has been a couple weeks now and happy to say, I do see a little improvement! Her urgency to get out and back to her safe spot is somewhat not so urgent. YAY!We are learning “easy” and calming pets before I open the door and she now sits still for this. Less of a mad dash! She has stepped up her loving game and really seeks attention as of late. This is a blessing for Lolli to say the least, but also for Tico that has taken on the big brother role.Tico is coming out of his shell and gaining confidence daily, this makes me incredibly happy! He will actually leave Lolli’s side when we are in the yard to try to learn some playing skills. So I’m guessing he feels her anxiety is lessening.Tico actually went to the kitchen to graze on a bowl of leftover dog food this morning, maybe Lolli will follow suit in the near future. There is good & bad in this friendship of fear between these two, but at this moment I’m seeing the good! Here’s to my blossoming babies❤️🐾❤️

Days 153-196: Our beautiful Lollipup has her furever home!! Lolli was featured in the Dunkirk Observer a couple weekends ago and with that came applications.I was a bit apprehensive as the last time I accepted apps it was a circus.I felt everyone saw a beautiful dog and wanted the “prize” ignoring her story, needing a fence, confident resident dog & to be home most of the day. I was totally discouraged. So with my heart knowing there is someone out there for all our residents I ended the app process until just a couple weeks ago.Then this app came in, met the requirements, yet I wasn’t quite ready to go round two with the circus of last time.Then I spoke to this pleasant voice…She & her boyfriend had read Lolli’s journey, bonus!! As we talked I was so hopeful. This couple had rescued a poodle from a horrible situation and basically gone through the same thing with her as I had Lolli.My hopefulness peaked. We spoke over the days leading up to our Meet & Greet at their home. When I met this little family I couldn’t believe the loving vibes I felt, the warmth.Lolli felt it also, as she went right to Justin. We toured their home & yard and found it to be perfect for Lolli’s needs and safety. I explained that Lolli is a extreme flight risk, and the fact that she doesn’t seek food a trapper wouldn’t be able to help get her home, so she would surely parish.Everything was understood about Lolli’s behaviors and Alisha & Justin seemed unfazed and certainly ready to love & care for her.Abby, Lolli’s new sister couldn’t be more perfect! We greeted this lil gal wearing a pretty dress, later she was in her pj’s.Feeling bittersweet, Maggie & I left Lollipup to start the next phase of her journey. Maggie accompanies me on these meet & greets and does a most polite job. Alisha, Justin & I became FB friends as a condition of adoption was to provide updates, which they happily obliged.So, the other wonderful thing about this adoption is Tico lives across the street from Lolli!! Both sets of parents are aware and will get them together.Beautiful, amazing & wonderful things happen to those who patiently wait. I swear there was some devine intervention in this.My heart is joyous but hurts, our home is certainly not the same without this beautiful presence.Thinking back on the early days and seeing our girl now, I cannot be more happier for her smile.I would be amiss if I didn’t thank my fellow volunteers, my friends & those who all followed this precious girls journey. Your loving support got us all through the ruff moments & celebrated the wondrous ones.I’m forever grateful to have gone on this journey and see this amazing outcome.I want to mention my pack of furgirls, Tessa, Maggie & Itty whom made all the difference in this transformation.Thanks for letting me share our home & love with yet another. My sincere love to all❤️